We ♥ jokes in our house, especially ones that sneak in some STEM learning love! The punnier the better. We tell knock knock jokes around the dinner table. My youngest likes to read joke books before going to bed. Sometimes I pop an educational joke into their school lunchbox. We tell riddles on long car trips. You get the idea…
You might have already seen our awesome list of 60+ science jokes, but I was starting to feel that the other STEM subjects deserved some punny love too! This may have resulted in my spending the last few hours
giggling researching and collating 45 of the funniest kid-friendly math jokes around.
So, if you’re looking for math jokes that will make your kids smile, giggle, snort and LOL, you’ve come to the right place! Here we have a whole bunch of kid-friendly math jokes and puns, that are perfect for primary / elementary school aged kids. The best bit is that most of these jokes require some understanding of math principles, so if your kids ‘get’ the jokes, then they are demonstrating and cementing their math knowledge, and if they need some of the jokes to be explained to them, then you can help them learn new concepts in a fun way.
If you’re a parent, you might like to print these out and pop them in their school lunchboxes, or maybe read a couple out before dinner each night. If you’re a teacher, I reckon they’d make great ice-breakers for the start of math class or in between activities. (There’s a link to a printable version below.)
45 Hilarious Math Jokes for Kids
Q. What can be right, but never wrong?
Q. How can you make seven even?
A. Take away the ‘s’.
Q. Which snakes are best at doing sums?
Q. What did the zero say to the eight?
A. Nice belt.
Q. Who do geometry teachers like to hang out with?
A. A small circle of friends.
Q. What do you call an empty parrot cage?
Q. Why can’t your nose be twelve inches long?
A. Because then it would be a foot.
Q. If two is company, and three is a crowd, what are four and five?
Q. Which sea creature can add up?
A. An octo-plus!
Teacher: “What is a forum?”
Pupil: “Two-um, plus two-um.”
Q. Why can’t you trust mathematicians?
A. Their loyalties are divided.
Q. Why is six afraid of seven?
A. Because seven ate nine!
Q. What do you call a missing octopus?
A. An octo-gone!
Q. What makes arithmetic hard work?
A. All those numbers you have to carry.
“Waiter, will the sausages be long?”
Waiter: “I’ll just go and measure them, Ma’am.”
Q. Did you hear about the tree growing outside the maths classroom?
A. It grew square roots.
Q. Which month has 28 days?
A. All of them!
Q. Why was the maths book sad?
A. Because it had too many problems.
Q. How many apples can you put in an empty box?
A. One. After that, it’s not empty any more.
The farmer said to the farmer’s hand “There’s 58 sheep in the upper field. Can you round them up for me?”
The farmer’s hand said “Sure, 60.”
Q. Who’s the queen of the pencil case?
A. The ruler.
Q. Why was the obtuse triangle upset?
A. Because it is never right…
Q. How to you keep warm in a cold room?
A. Go into a corner, because it’s usually 90 degrees.
Q. What did the acorn say when it grew up?
Q. What did Harry Potter say when Hermione reversed the curse?
Q. What did the piggy bank say?
Q. If I had six apples in one hand and seven oranges in the other, what would I have?
A. Big hands!
Q. Where do math teachers go on vacation?
A. Times Square!
Q. What do you call friends who love math?
Q: What do you get if you divide the circumference of a jack-o-lantern by its diameter?
A: Pumpkin Pi
Q. Are monsters good at maths?
A. Not unless you Count Dracula!
Q. Why was the triangle so adorable?
A. Because it had acute angles!
Q. Why can you never trust a maths teacher holding graph paper?
A. They must be plotting something!
Q. Why was the equal sign so humble?
A. Because she knew she wasn’t greater than anyone else.
Q. What do you call a number that can’t stay in one place?
A. A Roamin’ numeral.
Q. Why did seven eat nine?
A. Because you’re supposed to eat three squared meals a day.
Q. What is a math teacher’s favourite snake?
A. A pi-thon.
Q. You know what seems odd to me?
A. Numbers that can’t be divided by two.
Q. Which knight created the round table?
A. Sir Cumference!
Q. Which king loved fractions?
A. King Henry the 1/8.
Q. Why shouldn’t you argue with a decimal?
A. Because decimals always have a good point.
Q. What is a bird watcher’s favourite type of maths?
There are three types of people in this world; those that can count, and those that cannot.
Q. Why did the student get upset when her teacher called her average?
A. Because it was a mean thing to say.
Q. Have you heard the latest statistics joke?
Q. What did Al Gore play on his guitar?
A. An algorithm!
Print these out and inspire your kid’s inner nerd!
(This printable is a 3 paged, A4-sized, pdf file. You will need a pdf reader to open it. If you are printing on US ‘letter-sized’ paper, select ‘fit’ or ‘shrink to fit’ from your printer options. This printable is for personal use only. You may not sell, share, or link directly to this file.)
And if you’re after even more giggles, make sure to check out our original list of hilarious science jokes too!